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| ACT III SCENE II | The street before the prison. | |
| | Enter, on one side, DUKE VINCENTIO disguised as before; on the other, ELBOW, and Officers with POMPEY. | |
| ELBOW | Nay, if there be no remedy for it, but that you will | |
| | needs buy and sell men and women like beasts, we | |
| | shall have all the world drink brown and white bastard. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | O heavens! what stuff is here |
| POMPEY | 'Twas never merry world since, of two usuries, the | |
| | merriest was put down, and the worser allowed by | |
| | order of law a furred gown to keep him warm; and | |
| | furred with fox and lamb-skins too, to signify, that | |
| | craft, being richer than innocency, stands for the facing. | 9 |
| ELBOW | Come your way, sir. 'Bless you, good father friar. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | And you, good brother father. What offence hath | |
| | this man made you, sir? | |
| ELBOW | Marry, sir, he hath offended the law: and, sir, we | |
| | take him to be a thief too, sir; for we have found |
| | upon him, sir, a strange picklock, which we have | |
| | sent to the deputy. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | Fie, sirrah! a bawd, a wicked bawd! | |
| | The evil that thou causest to be done, | |
| | That is thy means to live. Do thou but think |
| | What 'tis to cram a maw or clothe a back | |
| | From such a filthy vice: say to thyself, | 20 | |
| | From their abominable and beastly touches | |
| | I drink, I eat, array myself, and live. | |
| | Canst thou believe thy living is a life, |
| | So stinkingly depending? Go mend, go mend. | |
| POMPEY | Indeed, it does stink in some sort, sir; but yet, | |
| | sir, I would prove-- | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | Nay, if the devil have given thee proofs for sin, | |
| | Thou wilt prove his. Take him to prison, officer: |
| | Correction and instruction must both work | |
| | Ere this rude beast will profit. | 30 | |
| ELBOW | He must before the deputy, sir; he has given him | |
| | warning: the deputy cannot abide a whoremaster: if | |
| | he be a whoremonger, and comes before him, he were |
| | as good go a mile on his errand. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | That we were all, as some would seem to be, | |
| | From our faults, as faults from seeming, free! | |
| ELBOW | His neck will come to your waist,--a cord, sir. | |
| POMPEY | I spy comfort; I cry bail. Here's a gentleman and a |
| | friend of mine. | |
| | Enter LUCIO. | |
| LUCIO | How now, noble Pompey! What, at the wheels of | |
| | Caesar? art thou led in triumph? What, is there | |
| | none of Pygmalion's images, newly made woman, to be | |
| | had now, for putting the hand in the pocket and |
| | extracting it clutch'd? What reply, ha? What | |
| | sayest thou to this tune, matter and method? Is't | |
| | not drowned i' the last rain, ha? What sayest | |
| | thou, Trot? Is the world as it was, man? Which is | |
| | the way? Is it sad, and few words? or how? The |
| | trick of it? | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | Still thus, and thus; still worse! | |
| LUCIO | How doth my dear morsel, thy mistress? Procures she | |
| | still, ha? | 50 | |
| POMPEY | Troth, sir, she hath eaten up all her beef, and she |
| | is herself in the tub. | |
| LUCIO | Why, 'tis good; it is the right of it; it must be | |
| | so: ever your fresh whore and your powdered bawd: | |
| | an unshunned consequence; it must be so. Art going | |
| | to prison, Pompey? |
| POMPEY | Yes, faith, sir. | |
| LUCIO | Why, 'tis not amiss, Pompey. Farewell: go, say I | |
| | sent thee thither. For debt, Pompey? or how? | |
| ELBOW | For being a bawd, for being a bawd. | 59 | |
| LUCIO | Well, then, imprison him: if imprisonment be the |
| | due of a bawd, why, 'tis his right: bawd is he | |
| | doubtless, and of antiquity too; bawd-born. | |
| | Farewell, good Pompey. Commend me to the prison, | |
| | Pompey: you will turn good husband now, Pompey; you | |
| | will keep the house. |
| POMPEY | I hope, sir, your good worship will be my bail. | |
| LUCIO | No, indeed, will I not, Pompey; it is not the wear. | |
| | I will pray, Pompey, to increase your bondage: If | |
| | you take it not patiently, why, your mettle is the | |
| | more. Adieu, trusty Pompey. 'Bless you, friar. |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | And you. | 70 | |
| LUCIO | Does Bridget paint still, Pompey, ha? | |
| ELBOW | Come your ways, sir; come. | |
| POMPEY | You will not bail me, then, sir? | |
| LUCIO | Then, Pompey, nor now. What news abroad, friar? |
| | what news? | |
| ELBOW | Come your ways, sir; come. | |
| LUCIO | Go to kennel, Pompey; go. | |
| | Exeunt ELBOW, POMPEY and Officers. | |
| | What news, friar, of the duke? | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | I know none. Can you tell me of any? |
| LUCIO | Some say he is with the Emperor of Russia; other | |
| | some, he is in Rome: but where is he, think you? | 81 | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | I know not where; but wheresoever, I wish him well. | |
| LUCIO | It was a mad fantastical trick of him to steal from | |
| | the state, and usurp the beggary he was never born |
| | to. Lord Angelo dukes it well in his absence; he | |
| | puts transgression to 't. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | He does well in 't. | |
| LUCIO | A little more lenity to lechery would do no harm in | |
| | him: something too crabbed that way, friar. | 90 |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | It is too general a vice, and severity must cure it. | |
| LUCIO | Yes, in good sooth, the vice is of a great kindred; | |
| | it is well allied: but it is impossible to extirp | |
| | it quite, friar, till eating and drinking be put | |
| | down. They say this Angelo was not made by man and |
| | woman after this downright way of creation: is it | |
| | true, think you? | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | How should he be made, then? | |
| LUCIO | Some report a sea-maid spawned him; some, that he | |
| | was begot between two stock-fishes. But it is |
| | certain that when he makes water his urine is | |
| | congealed ice; that I know to be true: and he is a | |
| | motion generative; that's infallible. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | You are pleasant, sir, and speak apace. | 100 | |
| LUCIO | Why, what a ruthless thing is this in him, for the |
| | rebellion of a codpiece to take away the life of a | |
| | man! Would the duke that is absent have done this? | |
| | Ere he would have hanged a man for the getting a | |
| | hundred bastards, he would have paid for the nursing | |
| | a thousand: he had some feeling of the sport: he |
| | knew the service, and that instructed him to mercy. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | I never heard the absent duke much detected for | |
| | women; he was not inclined that way. | |
| LUCIO | O, sir, you are deceived. | 110 | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | 'Tis not possible. |
| LUCIO | Who, not the duke? yes, your beggar of fifty; and | |
| | his use was to put a ducat in her clack-dish: the | |
| | duke had crotchets in him. He would be drunk too; | |
| | that let me inform you. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | You do him wrong, surely. |
| LUCIO | Sir, I was an inward of his. A shy fellow was the | |
| | duke: and I believe I know the cause of his | |
| | withdrawing. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | What, I prithee, might be the cause? | 119 | |
| LUCIO | No, pardon; 'tis a secret must be locked within the |
| | teeth and the lips: but this I can let you | |
| | understand, the greater file of the subject held the | |
| | duke to be wise. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | Wise! why, no question but he was. | |
| LUCIO | A very superficial, ignorant, unweighing fellow. |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | Either this is the envy in you, folly, or mistaking: | |
| | the very stream of his life and the business he hath | |
| | helmed must upon a warranted need give him a better | |
| | proclamation. Let him be but testimonied in his own | |
| | bringings-forth, and he shall appear to the |
| | envious a scholar, a statesman and a soldier. | |
| | Therefore you speak unskilfully: or if your | |
| | knowledge be more it is much darkened in your malice. | 131 | |
| LUCIO | Sir, I know him, and I love him. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | Love talks with better knowledge, and knowledge with |
| | dearer love. | |
| LUCIO | Come, sir, I know what I know. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | I can hardly believe that, since you know not what | |
| | you speak. But, if ever the duke return, as our | |
| | prayers are he may, let me desire you to make your |
| | answer before him. If it be honest you have spoke, | |
| | you have courage to maintain it: I am bound to call | |
| | upon you; and, I pray you, your name? | 141 | |
| LUCIO | Sir, my name is Lucio; well known to the duke. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | He shall know you better, sir, if I may live to |
| | report you. | |
| LUCIO | I fear you not. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | O, you hope the duke will return no more; or you | |
| | imagine me too unhurtful an opposite. But indeed I | |
| | can do you little harm; you'll forswear this again. |
| LUCIO | I'll be hanged first: thou art deceived in me, | |
| | friar. But no more of this. Canst thou tell if | |
| | Claudio die to-morrow or no? | 151 | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | Why should he die, sir? | |
| LUCIO | Why? For filling a bottle with a tundish. I would |
| | the duke we talk of were returned again: the | |
| | ungenitured agent will unpeople the province with | |
| | continency; sparrows must not build in his | |
| | house-eaves, because they are lecherous. The duke | |
| | yet would have dark deeds darkly answered; he would |
| | never bring them to light: would he were returned! | |
| | Marry, this Claudio is condemned for untrussing. | |
| | Farewell, good friar: I prithee, pray for me. The | |
| | duke, I say to thee again, would eat mutton on | |
| | Fridays. He's not past it yet, and I say to thee, |
| | he would mouth with a beggar, though she smelt brown | |
| | bread and garlic: say that I said so. Farewell. | |
| | Exit. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | No might nor greatness in mortality | 165 | |
| | Can censure 'scape; back-wounding calumny | |
| | The whitest virtue strikes. What king so strong |
| | Can tie the gall up in the slanderous tongue? | |
| | But who comes here? | |
| | Enter ESCALUS, Provost, and Officers with MISTRESS OVERDONE. | |
| ESCALUS | Go; away with her to prison! | |
| MISTRESS OVERDONE | Good my lord, be good to me; your honour is accounted | |
| | a merciful man; good my lord. |
| ESCALUS | Double and treble admonition, and still forfeit in | |
| | the same kind! This would make mercy swear and play | |
| | the tyrant. | |
| Provost | A bawd of eleven years' continuance, may it please | |
| | your honour. |
| MISTRESS OVERDONE | My lord, this is one Lucio's information against me. | |
| | Mistress Kate Keepdown was with child by him in the | |
| | duke's time; he promised her marriage: his child | |
| | is a year and a quarter old, come Philip and Jacob: | |
| | I have kept it myself; and see how he goes about to abuse me! |
| ESCALUS | That fellow is a fellow of much licence: let him be | |
| | called before us. Away with her to prison! Go to; | 170 | |
| | no more words. | |
| | Exeunt Officers with MISTRESS OVERDONE. | |
| | Provost, my brother Angelo will not be altered; | |
| | Claudio must die to-morrow: let him be furnished |
| | with divines, and have all charitable preparation. | |
| | if my brother wrought by my pity, it should not be | |
| | so with him. | |
| Provost | So please you, this friar hath been with him, and | |
| | advised him for the entertainment of death. | 191 |
| ESCALUS | Good even, good father. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | Bliss and goodness on you! | |
| ESCALUS | Of whence are you? | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | Not of this country, though my chance is now | |
| | To use it for my time: I am a brother | 210 |
| | Of gracious order, late come from the See | |
| | In special business from his holiness. | |
| ESCALUS | What news abroad i' the world? | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | None, but that there is so great a fever on | |
| | goodness, that the dissolution of it must cure it: |
| | novelty is only in request; and it is as dangerous | |
| | to be aged in any kind of course, as it is virtuous | |
| | to be constant in any undertaking. There is scarce | |
| | truth enough alive to make societies secure; but | |
| | security enough to make fellowships accurst: much |
| | upon this riddle runs the wisdom of the world. This | |
| | news is old enough, yet it is every day's news. I | |
| | pray you, sir, of what disposition was the duke? | |
| ESCALUS | One that, above all other strifes, contended | |
| | especially to know himself. | 210 |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | What pleasure was he given to? | |
| ESCALUS | Rather rejoicing to see another merry, than merry at | |
| | any thing which professed to make him rejoice: a | |
| | gentleman of all temperance. But leave we him to | |
| | his events, with a prayer they may prove prosperous; |
| | and let me desire to know how you find Claudio | |
| | prepared. I am made to understand that you have | |
| | lent him visitation. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | He professes to have received no sinister measure | |
| | from his judge, but most willingly humbles himself |
| | to the determination of justice: yet had he framed | |
| | to himself, by the instruction of his frailty, many | |
| | deceiving promises of life; which I by my good | |
| | leisure have discredited to him, and now is he | |
| | resolved to die. | 223 |
| ESCALUS | You have paid the heavens your function, and the | |
| | prisoner the very debt of your calling. I have | |
| | laboured for the poor gentleman to the extremest | |
| | shore of my modesty: but my brother justice have I | |
| | found so severe, that he hath forced me to tell him |
| | he is indeed Justice. | |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | If his own life answer the straitness of his | |
| | proceeding, it shall become him well; wherein if he | |
| | chance to fail, he hath sentenced himself. | |
| ESCALUS | I am going to visit the prisoner. Fare you well. |
| DUKE VINCENTIO | Peace be with you! | |
| | Exeunt ESCALUS and Provost. | |
| | He who the sword of heaven will bear | |
| | Should be as holy as severe; | |
| | Pattern in himself to know, | |
| | Grace to stand, and virtue go; |
| | More nor less to others paying | |
| | Than by self-offences weighing. | |
| | Shame to him whose cruel striking | 240 | |
| | Kills for faults of his own liking! | |
| | Twice treble shame on Angelo, |
| | To weed my vice and let his grow! | |
| | O, what may man within him hide, | |
| | Though angel on the outward side! | |
| | How may likeness wade in crimes, | |
| | Making practise on the times, |
| | To draw with idle spiders' strings | |
| | Most ponderous and substantial things! | |
| | Craft against vice I must apply: | |
| | With Angelo to-night shall lie | |
| | His old betrothed but despis'd; |
| | So disguise shall, by the disguised, | |
| | Pay with falsehood false exacting, | |
| | And perform an old contracting. | |
| | Exit. | |